Tuesday, March 23, 2010

MEGA-HUGE TWILIGHT SECRET FINALLY REVEALED!

Today, the official theatrical one-sheet for Eclipse came out, and it was pretty awesome. Bella in between Edward and Jacob, symbolizing (and verbalizing too, for all of those symbol-hating fans) the choice she must make between Edward and Jacob, true mythical love or down-to-earth reality love, vampire or werewolf. It’s relevant, if not totally obvious and what we were all probably expecting.


Everyone looks good in this poster. Edward, hot and chiseled as ever. Bella, wig-tastic and looking serious/seriously pretty! Jacob looking….well, is it just us or does he look younger than in New Moon? Still mighty fine, but younger? Do you guys see that, too?

Anyway, as we discussed what we liked about the poster, our eyes couldn’t help but stop at Edward. There was something there that caught our attention. What was it...?

And then it hit us. Oh, it hit us hard. And it’s tearin’ up our hearts

Edward looks just like a dude from N*Sync.

Look, LOOK! If anyone in the Twilight Saga could be a boy bander, it's gonna be Edward. He meets all the criteria:
  • Styled hair--Check
  • Denim Jacket--Check
  • Moody Boy Band Face (emotions include, but are not limited to--bad ass-ness, shyness, confidence, yearning, and aloofness)--Check
  • Dark colors that say "We're musicans, take us seriously. We swear we won't wear those Tommy Hilfiger track suits anymore."--Check
 
People, it took us by surprise too. And we were resistant at first. Our precious, beloved Edward....AN N*SNYC WANNABE? No, no....it was too much. It was just a coincidence, we said. A fluke in the wardrobe and hair department. We mean, we loved N*Sync, but we don't want to relive those days, and we certainly don't want our imaginary husband (Yes, we share him. That just proves how strong our friendship is...) patterned after a combination, albeit a VERY HOT combination, of Justin Timberlake and J.C. Chasez.
 
But we couldn't deny it after we found this...
 

LOOK AT JUSTIN'S COAT. LOOK AT EDWARD'S COAT.

 
OMG.......it's true. Stephenie Meyer's Edward was obviously based on the members of N*Sync. We're assuming that, although Stephenie Meyer talks about loving Linkin Park and Muse and them being such inspirations for Twilight, we suspect that what was playing in her DiscMan was actually N*Sync's greatest hits. I mean, she began writing Twilight in 2003, the year after N*Sync's final Celebrity tour. The break-up of the group was imminent, and Stephenie was devastated. Where else was she going to get her pefectly manufactured pop tunes crafted by a group of attractive, mostly straight men? So, as she was writing, her sadness permeated into the story, creating an Edward that could have been equally at home touring the world in a famous boy band as he was in Forks, Washingon.
 
This certainly doesn't change Andee and Grey's opinion of Edward at all. We were in middle school at the height of N*Sync's career, so you can bet that we jammed out at our slumber parties to a little bit of JT and crew, and thought they were super dreamy. But I bet Bella would be having seconds thoughts...she doesn't strike us as the type to fangirl over a group of wholesome pop stars. She fell in love with a vampire, for Pete's sake, not a teen hearthrob.
 
She'd probably tell him bye, bye, bye.

7 comments:

  1. Interesting theory.

    I totally see it now. I used to have a JT poster over my bed. He was laying down surrounded by candles... I also had an Ozzy Osbourne poster and a Chachi poster but that's beside the point. How I wish I wasn't to ashamed/old/sensible/uggggh to have an Edward poster.

    Tsk, tsk. The ugly, stupid duster jacket thing (Can you tell I hate it? And that I'm not sure what one calls it?) is booooooo on both.

    I wonder if anyone has written a fic about vampire boy bands? Hmm... Was that what was up with those freaky rockers in Jennifer's Body?

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  2. *snorts* i lost it at the coat. perfect.

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  3. CHACHI!!!!!!!!!!! Win. Very large win.

    That will be the next big thing....vampire boy bands.

    "It's tearin' up my heart when I'm with you,
    I wanna suck your blood, oh yes it's true,
    and no matter what you do you smell the same
    sweet and tasty, too...."

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  4. In 2001 I was in New York with a poster outside of TRL proclaiming to NSYNC that I was not jailbait therefore available to them. Now 9 years later, you have combined my previous love with mu current. Well done, ladies. Well done.

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  5. If you liked that combination, you should check out some of our other crazy combos. We have linked Twilight to rodeos, grandmothers, Wal-Mart, Betty White, electronic bingo, and so many, many more.

    Did your sign really say that you were legal and available? I am now at home starting a slow clap of appreciation....well done, my friend. Well done.

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  6. DUDE i totally had the same thought about the denim jacket! oh em gee, you girls are MY people. NSYNC? TWILIGHT?!

    what about the matching white suits from GMHSALMTOY? Or the glitter suits from Rolling Stone?

    xo
    moon

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  7. NOOOOOO!!! You've officially ruined Edward for me FOREVER.

    Okay, just kidding. Sort of. Thankfully I don't actually know NSYNC songs because I'm pretty sure if I did I would now hum them everytime I look at a picture of Edward. Which is a lot.

    That being said, I think you're really on to something. Not sure how I feel about it, lol.

    xo
    JJ

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