Monday, June 21, 2010

If Forks and Spoons Do It, Is It Called Sporking?

I love romance as much as the next girl, but I've really never been know, porn. Obviously I've seen it, but I don't have a collection or anything. So I'm a little concerned about this apparent Eating Utensil fetish I've picked up. *Ashamed* Yes it's true. I'm hooked--fork on fork, spoon on spoon, even spoon on knife! It's totally hot.

But fork on spoon? That is a little too much for me. Don't they realize that their union could result in the unholy creation of a spork, that White Plastic Cafeteria Staple from Hell? I would rather stare straight down Victoria's throat while she's eating my face than have to use a freaking spork ever again. (Worst case scenario to use a spork? Eating spaghetti. It. Is. IMPOSSIBLE.)

Anyway, on to something different and totally unrelated.

Our bloggy heroes UC and Moon from Letters to Twilight/Rob got to meet Stephenie Meyer on Friday and today they had a terrific post. Seriously, it's like they wrote it just to make other Twilight blogs that may not be as cool or as famous or have as many hits as them totally jealous really good. The biggest thing they could share in the post was that Meyer reads LTT like, everyday. How cool is that? The woman whose fantasical dream became the reason that I am sitting at work, not working but instead typing this very sentence reads one of my favorite fansites. I wonder if she's ever commented and what alias she used.


It was while telling Andee about Stephenie reading LTT everyday that she shared with me this glorious revelation:

If Stephenie Meyer reads LTT every day, then it stands to reason that she read LTT on March 30, 2010 when this post appeared. And IF Stephenie Meyer, reading LTT like she does every day, saw the "read this if you love NSYNC" link and clicked it because she did indeed have a mighty love for all things NSYNC...

....she would have been taken directly to OUR SITE and our thrilling expose' on how Edward Cullen spent the late 90's/early 00's as a boy band member, all of which means.....


Oh my gah.

This is huge for me. HUUUUUUUUGE. The Woman Who Created Edward Cullen maybe possibly visited our site. Sure, she probably accidently clicked the link while she was trying to scroll down to the comments section of LTT's post, but for the brief split-second it took for her to press the "Back" button, she may have been here. I had the Anxiety Tickle Monsters inside my chest this morning, but as soon as Andee revealed this possibility, however unlikely it was that she would have clicked away from LTT because of an all-consuming lust for NSYNC material, the tickling stopped and instead I felt AWESOME.

So I just want to say "Thank You" to LTT for linking to us and to Edward Cullen for wearing that hideous black denim jacket. You created a 10% chance that Steph visited Welcome to Forks, Y'all and stopped the evil tickle monsters.

Hearts and Rainbows and HI, STEPHENIE MEYER!!!,


P.S. Holy crap. I just realized that The Mother of All Things Twilight may have possibly visited our blog, which is full of things like forks and spoons having sex with each other.

*anxious tickeling begins again*


  1. Further proof of your status as a pr0n site.

    Guess what??!?!! I know Stephenie Meyer's screen name. It's: fangbanger/antisocialangel. ;)

  2. Oh Girls, THINK about all the awful (aka awesome) perverted stuff we've said about UNDERAGE BOYS & ROB & F-words we've dropped on LTT... we were freakin' just a little:) But then figured... if she reads us despite all that, it must be okay... and that's the same for you, in case she made her way over here! Which i hope she did b/c your site RULES!



  3. Can I keep calling you fangbanger? Cause I kinda like that name.

  4. THANK YOU!!! I am so emboldened by your words of encouragement, I promise the next post will be nothing BUT utensil sex. All post long.

    Yeah, baby.

  5. You may call me fangbanger. I just get lazy sometimes.