Tuesday, March 30, 2010

If It Ain't Midnight Sun...

Today's big news is that Stephenie Meyer--completely and totally out of the blue (or gray, if you live in Forks)--announced that she will release a new novelette (is that like a novel omlette?) entitled "The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner" and will chronicle what it was like for Bree from Eclipse to be a newborn vampire.

Here are the emotions we felt, in the order we felt them:

1. WTF?
2. New Twilight material. That's kind of neat....
3. .....but it's about Bree? That little newborn from Eclipse?
4. WTF?
5. Cheese and crackers, I'm hungry. Is it lunch yet?
6. Why is Stephenie writing new Twilight stuff......hey, wait a minute.....WHERE THE HELL IS MIDNIGHT SUN?

While we are just THRILLED that Stephenie Meyer, who has stated (as Andee so very correctly pointed out) that she wanted to be away from the Twilight world for a while, has contradicted herself and brought us some new Twilight noms to munch on, the only question on so many people's minds today is WHAT ABOUT MIDNIGHT SUN?

Steph, listen. We love you. Your brain was the very birthplace of our beloved Edward, Bella and Jacob. You created this fantastic world that makes rational, sane, NORMAL people want to actually check out of the Hey, Reality Really Isn't That Bad Motel and check into your Twilight Hotel of Wonderfulmentness and Wish Fulfillment. (Even though riding the elevators makes you sick, you still get an Edward or a Jacob--or a Bella, for that matter--on your pillow each evening, so it's worth it.) YOU ARE THE MOMMA OF TWILIGHT. You made this all possible. But we. only. want. Midnight Sun.


Stephenie, you are awesome. You are SO AWESOME, in fact, that we are pretty sure there's NOTHING that you can't do. We bet you could:

1. Discover the cure for cancer
2. Bring peace to the Middle East
3. Acheive worldwide nuclear disarmament
4. Fix healthcare. We mean REALLY fix it. Like, to the point where EVERYONE is happy with it.
5. Find the perfect renewable energy source
6. Travel to Mars on a spaceship you built in your backyard.
7. While on Mars, discover the existence of alien lifeforms.
8. Recover the Holy Grail.
9. Unearth the lost city of Atlantis. The real one, not the resort-vacation one.
10.Find out how many licks it takes to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop *Note from Andee: Grey totally put "Tootie Pop" instead of "Tootsie Pop" and I had to correct her. I almost didn't because it would have been funny. *

You could do all these things, Stephenie Meyer, and you would be celebrated by the entire world. We would cheer you, toast you, pat you on the back, throw you a ticker tape parade. You would be hailed, applauded, and just plain lauded. But when all the celebrations were finished, we would still ask you....


"But what about Midnight Sun????"

Finish the book, Stephenie. FINISH THE BOOK. THEN you can work on the Tootsie Pop thing.

"How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootie Pop?"  We swear this is not *that* type of blog.

Monday, March 29, 2010

It's Monday, so We're Just Gonna Phone This One In

Monday's are always rough days. You'd think we'd be all refreshed, rejuvenated, recharged by the previous weekend, but no, we're not. You'd also think that we'd have all that free time to come up with totally awesome things to blog about, but that would be another "negative".

So because we don't use our free time wisely, and because we're habitually lazy, you good people suffer.

Today as Grey drove home for lunch thru massive amounts of highway construction at a slower-than-a-snail's pace, she let her mind wander into Twi-La-La Land, a magical place where Edward and Jacob (and sometimes Bella) exist right alongside our own world. She was moving at about -5 miles an hour, and her Mickey D's was getting cold. Only Edward could save her from soggy french fries:

Make Believe Situation in Grey's Head, brought to you by the Alabama State Road and Bridge Department's Everlasting Construction on US Hwy 431:

It's a cold, cloudy day in Headland, Alabama. The perfect day for Edward and I to be out in public together. It's so freaking sunny here we hardly get the chance. It would be the perfect day....if only we weren't stuck in my non-Volvo in construction traffic.

Grey: Oh my gah, this is ridiculous. I only have like 45 minutes to eat lunch. My McDonald's Six-Piece Chicken Nugget Value Meal is going to be cold by the time we get to my house. Which I could hit with a rock from here. Which is totally an analogy as to how close we are to my house versus how long it will take to get to said close house because WE'RE. NOT. MOVING.

Edward: I understand analogies, my love. But you couldn't hit your house with a rock from here. You have weak, ineffectual arms.

Grey: Why are you so freaking calm? And why are you quoting Grey's Anatomy? Do you think that's funny b/c my name is GREY? And it's "fists" by the way, "weak, inneffectual fists." Anyway, we are moving like NEGATIVE 5 MILES PER HOUR. Edward, we are going so slow we are literally going back in time. I will be a high schooler again soon, which will be great because then I won't feel so creepy about a 25-year-old dating a 17-year-old.

Edward: Grey, I'm 109. So a) it's not creepy, and b) I'm used to things moving slowly. It's part of that eternal existance thing.

Grey: Well, maybe I shouldn't be dating such an old man. It's gross.

Edward: Stop quoting movie lines. The only person who thinks it's funny is the person doing the quoting. And if I can't quote Grey's Anatomy, you can't quote that stupid vampire movie.

As I pout, Edward looks over at me, with that adoring gaze that I would normally find annoying if he were a normal, mortal man. But since he's Edward Freaking Cullen, I like it. Then he gets that mischevious look that I normally associate with something else entirely, and rolls down the driver's side window. He flings his arm up towards the roof of the car and then--BAM!--he's gunning the engine and speeding out into the median, bypassing all the traffic. I turn from staring flabergasted at him to look out the windshield, only to be face-to-face with a giant dump truck full of gravel, only to be just as suddenly not face-to-face with the gravel truck, because we are now weaving in and out of the lanes, around non-moving cars, past that stupid grinder machine that always spits rocks at my car, leaving behind in our dust--ironically enough--the street sweeper that always kicks up dirt and mucks up my car when I'm helplessly stuck in traffic.

Then we're in a turn lane, zooming thru my subdivision, and pulling up in front of my house. All this has taken what seems like seconds. My Mickey D's McNuggets are saved. I turn to offer Edward a grateful hug when I hear a *thud* on the roof of my house, with a few *knocks* and *pings* as a quarter-sized rock rolls off the house and into the driveway.

Grey: Is that....?

Edward: ....a rock? Yes. Turns out you were right. You could hit your house from there.

Sometimes I could just kill him...again.


So, what do you guys wish that you could do with Edward? Other than have sex with him, of course. We don't think we would like to have vampire/human sex with Edward, because he's cold and the last thing we like is cold hands or feet in bed. Super mood killer. But we never said anything about Rob Pattinson. Do you want Edward to get you thru traffic faster, too? Or how about taking him to school with you so that you can know all the answers for the test? Would you want him to clean the bathroom drain, cause all that yucky hair is gross? What would you want Edward to do for you?

Again, for you.......not to you.

*Note: This story is completely fabricated. Because obviously, McDonald's french fries don't get soggy. There are enough preservatives in those bad boys to keep them stiff for WEEKS. They are the Viagra of Fast Food Fries.

Friday, March 26, 2010

So Did I tell Y'all I Have My First Niece? Subtitled: Grey is totally going to "photobomb" Andee's post because she left it on Blogger for Grey to edit. Hee hee hee...

I would like to formally present to all our bloggy friends....my First Ever For REAL Niece, River! Here she is....she's totally cute!
This was when she was first born! *Note from Grey: Newborn babies are aliens from outer space, who have mind control powers. Why else would perfectly normal adults start talking in crazy spastic monkey voices? Because it amuses the baby aliens...*

And I'm going to corrupt her...don't think badly of me, I promise I love her, BUT I VOW RIGHT NOW SHE WILL BE A TWILIGHT FAN WITH ME!!!

If you haven't noticed by our fake blogger names....we are kinda somewhat sneaky Twilight fans. Only our closest friends know, and almost none of them know we have a blog about Twilight. *Note from Grey: A few of our friends wouldn't understand, so it's really in our best interest to keep it on the DL. I don't want to have to go through the Twilight version of "Your shoes are ugly."* Our husbands/fiances did find out and they make fun of us all the time, but they don't read it...which is fantastic...because we talk about them frequently! *Note from Grey: I'll say it to Brando's face. I ain't scared...Brando is my fiance. We're getting married this year! But more importantly, I'M GETTING A HOUSE! Also equally important, I'm NOT getting a baby.*

She's already a rock star!

Anyway, my new niece is 1 week and 5 days old. Her hair looks like a punk rocker and I have to say she kinda looks like me and my brother when we were born, except for the hair. (We didn't have hair until we were 3 years old. People thought I was a boy. I had earrings at 6 mths old and they STILL thought I was a boy....)


Isn't she cute? *Note from Grey: This "cute face" is in fact the face baby aliens make in anticipation of feasting on your brains. It's only because they are weak and have inferior motor skills that they can't reach your head to devour what's inside. Lesson learned here: Don't let babies near your head.*

I now tell my motives with my niece...she is going to be my OFFICIAL excuse to buy really embarassing Twilight Saga memorabilia!

I've already decided I'm going to start reading her Twilight whenever I go see her, starting with the first, but Grey has informed me not to read her Breaking Dawn because that might REALLY scare her! But I might still do it! *Note from Grey: NO! She will be afraid of dogs FOREVER!*

River: "I have fingers, y'all!"

And I'm going to probably ruin her love life forever, which I'm not incredibly proud of, because she is going to grow up believing Edward is real! But he's not, and no matter how many times I tell this kid that he doesn't exist, she will still, in the back of her mind, believe he is out there somewhere (like we all do...and don't lie, I know you do...even if you do have a significant other!)

I don't know if the bloggers have noticed this but Grey is somewhat of a baby o'phobe...so if she does make comments on this blog, which I imagine she will, they should be HILARIOUS! Just gonna throw that out there Grey! *Note from Grey: Oh my gah, the pressure...you just predicted I would be funny. You have doomed all the comments from me on today's post. Don't you know that I have the blogger version of erectile dysfunction, and if we do all this talk, talk, talking about being funny, I WILL HAVE PERFORMANCE ISSUES???!!I thought you would be more sensitive to this, Andee...*

So this is my confession....I'm going to spoil my new niece with Twilight stuff....does anybody have any objections? Let me know what y'all think because the corruption starts today, at like 2:00 this afternoon, so if its a NO you better let me know quick!!!!


Last picture I've seen as of today, she's smiling because I'm coming to see her! *Note from Grey: And because you're bringing her fresh brains.*

Love,

Andee


Final note from Grey: I do not think that River looks like an alien. I just think ALL babies look like aliens...River is actually a very cute baby. I just hope she's polite. There's nothing I hate more that a baby with bad manners.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

New Moon Deleted Scenes Breakdown...from the mind of Andee...

Okay...so the breakdown....some are funny antics and some are realistic...I go back and forth so hang in there!


Bella’s Birthday Cake - Okay I really didn't care that that scene was cut...it didn't do it for me :)




Driving Home From Party- I really liked the acting skills in this one, they did a good job portraying what was in the book. I def wouldn't have minded seeing this scene in the movie!




Walking in the Woods - This was HILARIOUS to watch, you hear all of these spooky, scarey sounds and see absolutley nothing, always hate seeing the deleted scenes without the wolves in them, its very nonclimatic!




Charlie Puts Bella to Bed- I applaud Kristen's acting skills in this scene, did NOT like the upside down camera angle...kinda made me sick, BUT if this scene was left in it would have made the Month's Changing In Chair scene a little less gutwrenching...




Bob’s Bikes- It wasn't a huge important scene BUT it would have been nice if Bella had a scene in between her pulling up at Jacob's with the bikes, their really wasn't a real explanation how she got them!




Bike Crash - (Don't you love the picture?) Watching this scene made me think that a car was passing this poor injured biker dude, and just staring and not stopping to help, in my head i was screaming "HELP THE POOR GUY!" and I kept waiting for Victoria to pop out because i thoughyt she was the one that caused the guy to wreck, but no such luck!




Bella’s Nightmare and Chat with Charlie - THAT IS THE WEIRDEST scene I HAVE EVER SEEN IN ANY TWILIGHT MOVIE EVER! THAT WAS MORE BATHOS THAN THE MONKEY REFERENCES IN TWILIGHT!



Remembering the Meadow - I kinda liked this scene, kinda wished it was in there. I will take seeing Robward have the wonky legs in the meadow anyday!



Mike Left at Cinema - THAT WAS HILARIOUS!!! and that is totally Mike Welch's personality, from what we saw at Twicon2010...well played Mike Welch, well played! (Just have to add, he looks SOOOO much better as a brunette)




I’m Here if You Want to Talk - I love it! I just think Billy Burke steals every scene he's in....he's a good actor

And the final deleted scene:



Victoria Driving - "Like sand through the hourglass, so are the Days of Our Lives"....cue corney music....SCENE!
V: Oh, me and James loved to hunt eachother....blah, blah, blah...
I CAN'T EVEN FINISH THE IMAGINERY DIALOGUE! No wonder this was Melissa Rosenberg's favorite scene....it was the WORST for sure! I felt like I was watching a soap, and the people in the car were awful actors....my goodness...I'm applauding Chris Weitz for deleting this scene as I write....which is kinda hard to do!

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Andee will never let Grey blog alone again...

Today, Andee is going to let me run wild and write whatever I want. I won't be around tomorrow because I'll be busy influencing government policy in Montgomery, Alabama, using bar-b-que chicken and ribs as my weapons of choice. "Oh, you don't want to support the 2-1-1 bill? That's too bad....here, try this bar-b-que sauce....no, it's not hot.....oh, it IS hot? I had no idea...." So today is MY day to do WHATEVER I please.
Unfortunately for Andee and everyone else involved, this is probably not a good thing. Because this happens...

When I was in 3rd grade, I had an awesome birthday party. It was out at my grandparent's farm, and we all loaded up into the back of a 1967 Ford pickup truck and headed down the street and to the edge of the woods. It was there that my parents released us into the wild.

Seriously. That was my party.

But it was really super fun! There was an ankle-deep creek that sprang from the roots of a giant oak tree that was growing in the side of a cliff. It was truly magical. Only we couldn't drink the creek water, cause the cows probably peed in it. And we played Indians and hide and seek and tried to cross the creek over fallen logs. What made it really special was that it was a boy/girl party, so we were all trying to do things to impress each other, like the girls would take running leaps and try to make it over the creek without getting wet.

And the boys? Well, the boys would take their shirts off.

Did I forget to mention that this was 1993? And denim shorts were all the rage in boys fashion?

Yes, it was like a tiny, pre-pubescent version of the Twilight Wolf Pack, running through the woods, shirtless and jorted....

This memory made me think of what it would be like to have Stephenie Meyer's world of mythical creatures down here in the South. It wouldn't exactly be the same, though, would it? I guess it would all start with Tallulah Belle Swan, a teenaged beauty queen (winner of Miss Harvest Day, Miss Watermelon Rind, and Miss Rattlesnake Rodeo. She never could win that elusive Miss National Peanut Festival, however; a sore subject that to this day still brings back stories of backstage sabatoge every time it gets brought up). When her parents divorced because her mother ran away with the Swann's frozen food man (an ironic twist of fate, every good story needs one), Tallulah Belle was forced to move with her dad to the tiny town of Headland, Alabama. It was there at the local high school that she met the mysterious Dumas family, and in particular the youngest boy, Jack. After a series of strange occurances and lots of totally-chaste-but-still-completely-obvious-sexual tension, the two fall in love. But Jack has a secret...

During summer vacation, Tallulah Belle works down at the Tractor Auction selling chili dogs, and meets fellow employee Matthew "Mutt" Howyler from the nearby trailer park. The only two teenagers at the auction, they quickly become friends. Or so Tallulah Belle thinks. In fact, Mutt has fallen deeply in love with her. One day, when Jack comes to pick up Tallulah Belle and take her to the blueberry festival downtown, Mutt and Jack get into a confrontation over Tallulah Belle. But she can't help but think there was more to the altercation than just teenaged jealousy...

It turns out that there has been an epic, mythical war going on in Headland that Tallulah knew nothing about, and her precious Jack and best friend Mutt were both involved. You see, Mutt belongs to the town's legendary Coyote Pack, a group of southern boys who can magically transform into coyotes after consuming an entire 12-pack of Natural Light. (There's something about how the beer hops interact with their DNA. They could explain it to you, I guess, but they're drunk most of the time, so it hardly ever makes sense.) Each night, the boys gather, "jort up," consume copious amounts of Natty Light, and turn into coyotes. They then roam the fields of Headland and nearby Tumbleton, sniffing out and destroying cows that have the dreaded Mad Cow disease (Disclaimer: Cows from here don't have Mad Cow. This is just a story. Our cows have perfectly pleasant dispositions) and eating tiny little sweatered lap dogs when their owners let them outside to tinkle and make boom-boom.

To make matters even MORE complicated, Tallulah's true love Jack Dumas is Mutt's sworn enemy. Do you know what the natural enemy of the coyote is? Do you know what farmers put in cow fields to protect the cows? Well, the enemy of the coyote is none other than the donkey. Yes, you read it right...Jack and his family transform into donkeys each night, and place themselves in the cowfields to protect the innocent, not-mad cows from the Coyote Pack's cow-blood lust. A swift kick in the head and a nip at the ear, and the coyotes are running, tail between their legs. All night long, you hear the sound of their epic, eternal battle: "Arrrrrrrooooooooooooo" intermingled with "Heeee-HAW, heeee-HAW."

Oh, yeah. The Dumas donkey family also performs an even more important task for the common good: keeping the townspeople of Headland safe from all those drunken coyotes.

*Who should Tallulah Belle choose--the donkey or the coyote? Did you enjoy this pointless story? Did you see that I named the donkey Jack Dumas, or Jack Dumb Ass, or JACK ASS? You know, cause he's a donkey? Or that the coyote was Mutt Howyler? Yeah, that one wasn't as good...*

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

MEGA-HUGE TWILIGHT SECRET FINALLY REVEALED!

Today, the official theatrical one-sheet for Eclipse came out, and it was pretty awesome. Bella in between Edward and Jacob, symbolizing (and verbalizing too, for all of those symbol-hating fans) the choice she must make between Edward and Jacob, true mythical love or down-to-earth reality love, vampire or werewolf. It’s relevant, if not totally obvious and what we were all probably expecting.


Everyone looks good in this poster. Edward, hot and chiseled as ever. Bella, wig-tastic and looking serious/seriously pretty! Jacob looking….well, is it just us or does he look younger than in New Moon? Still mighty fine, but younger? Do you guys see that, too?

Anyway, as we discussed what we liked about the poster, our eyes couldn’t help but stop at Edward. There was something there that caught our attention. What was it...?

And then it hit us. Oh, it hit us hard. And it’s tearin’ up our hearts

Edward looks just like a dude from N*Sync.

Look, LOOK! If anyone in the Twilight Saga could be a boy bander, it's gonna be Edward. He meets all the criteria:
  • Styled hair--Check
  • Denim Jacket--Check
  • Moody Boy Band Face (emotions include, but are not limited to--bad ass-ness, shyness, confidence, yearning, and aloofness)--Check
  • Dark colors that say "We're musicans, take us seriously. We swear we won't wear those Tommy Hilfiger track suits anymore."--Check
 
People, it took us by surprise too. And we were resistant at first. Our precious, beloved Edward....AN N*SNYC WANNABE? No, no....it was too much. It was just a coincidence, we said. A fluke in the wardrobe and hair department. We mean, we loved N*Sync, but we don't want to relive those days, and we certainly don't want our imaginary husband (Yes, we share him. That just proves how strong our friendship is...) patterned after a combination, albeit a VERY HOT combination, of Justin Timberlake and J.C. Chasez.
 
But we couldn't deny it after we found this...
 

LOOK AT JUSTIN'S COAT. LOOK AT EDWARD'S COAT.

 
OMG.......it's true. Stephenie Meyer's Edward was obviously based on the members of N*Sync. We're assuming that, although Stephenie Meyer talks about loving Linkin Park and Muse and them being such inspirations for Twilight, we suspect that what was playing in her DiscMan was actually N*Sync's greatest hits. I mean, she began writing Twilight in 2003, the year after N*Sync's final Celebrity tour. The break-up of the group was imminent, and Stephenie was devastated. Where else was she going to get her pefectly manufactured pop tunes crafted by a group of attractive, mostly straight men? So, as she was writing, her sadness permeated into the story, creating an Edward that could have been equally at home touring the world in a famous boy band as he was in Forks, Washingon.
 
This certainly doesn't change Andee and Grey's opinion of Edward at all. We were in middle school at the height of N*Sync's career, so you can bet that we jammed out at our slumber parties to a little bit of JT and crew, and thought they were super dreamy. But I bet Bella would be having seconds thoughts...she doesn't strike us as the type to fangirl over a group of wholesome pop stars. She fell in love with a vampire, for Pete's sake, not a teen hearthrob.
 
She'd probably tell him bye, bye, bye.

Monday, March 22, 2010

New Moon DVD Weekend

This weekend was yet another reunion of that dynamic duo, Andee and Grey!! (Three weekends in a row--it's unheard of!!) And this time it was all for the joy of popping our brand new New Moon movie into the DVD player and tweaking out to all the EXTRAS! We didn't actually watch the movie together, although we did make it to the break up with Chris Weitz's commentary turned on. He's adorable, but we had to stop. We had husbands/fiance's downstairs to entertain. Not like that, you sluts! Geez, it's not all fanfic up at Mr. and Mrs. Andee's house.

After Grey's Wal-Mart experience (detailed more fully in the comments for today's LTT post), and Andee's disappointment that she missed her Wally's New Moon actual, honest-to-goodness party AND that they didn't have a Blu-Ray edition, we were actually lucky we even have the dang DVD in our greedy little hands. Also lucky? The fact that the menfolk had both fishing AND the Kentucky b-ball game to distract them from our NM pursuits. Muah-ha-ha-ha-ha.

We started with--DUH--the Eclipse sneak peek, and it was epic. It showed us so many things that we have to look forward to:

1. LEAH! Did you see how bitchy she looked all the time?? Sweetness! And she totally is rocking outfits that complement the boys jorts/korts/sworts...cutoff blue jeans and K-Mart tank tops! (Don't hate...these were Grey's wardrobe staples for the summer of 1997...)

Got the bitchy look NAILED, sweetheart.


2.  The HAIR!! Did you see Bella's wig? Not half bad. We were beyond worried when those graduation/Jacksonville pictures came out, and the funky wig line was all visible and stuff. But the Bella hair shots in the sneaky peeky? Good enough for us. Also, we were totally digging Rosalie's hair in the training/fight scenes, all braided and swept up. Because of course the most beautiful of the Cullen clan would go to war looking like it was her senior prom. It was hands-down a better look than the New Moon wig.

Why are they not happy? Their hair looks crazy better than normal.


And speaking of better wigs than New Moon....JASPER'S HAIR! We love, love, LOVE his hair. All limp and wavy...it reminds us of the boys we used to like when we were in middle school. (Shut up. It was the late 90's, Gavin Rossdale pictures covered the insides of our lockers, and we both took turns dating a boy who loved KoRN. We may or may not have owned multiple pairs of Adidas track pants. Ok, we may have. We loved the swoosh, swoosh they made when we walked.) We have a theory about why it is so un-curly...maybe Jasper's hair isn't naturally curly, so he has Alice curl it every morning before they go to school. Well, with all the newborn drama happening, Alice is all like, "Jasper! I don't have time for this! The newborns are getting closer every day, and we have more important things to do than curl your hair! Besides, it's going to look better this afternoon anyway. Trust me."  But Jasper doesn't listen, and tries to curl his hair himself. It looks decent, but little did Jasper know that because of the coming freak storm, the weather is unsually humid for the Pacific Northwest, causing all of Jaspers curls to fall out, leaving behind only chin length waves, which everyone seems to love. Even Rosalie unthaws a little to tell Jasper his hair looks really good today. "I told you so," says Alice. And.....SCENE.

3. Riley and the Newborns. Sounds like a band....anyway, we have already fallen in love with poor, poor Riley. He is so freaking cute, and he's just a pawn in Victoria's dirty little game. We just want to give him hugs, but we're afraid he would bite us. He's going to be heartbroken when he realizes that Victoria never cared for him at all. Well, he'll be heartbroken for those 2 seconds between the realization of betrayal and death by wolf-induced dismemberment, but still.....poor hot Riley.

Lesson learned here? Never trust a redheaded vampire.


We were really happy to see some footage of the newbies, and we are thinking that the lumber yard scene is going to be awesome. (And for those of you who read the script, doesn't it sound visually awesome??) Our favorite though, is definitely going to be Bree. She's such a little cutie in the sneak peek, which is sad, because she is going to get ripped to pieces and set on fire. Being a newborn really sucks, apparently.

Aww, sweetie.....you're doomed.


Those are the things that the Eclipse sneak peek made us look forward to the most. However, there are a couple of things that we would like to THANK the sneaky peeky for giving us, numbers one and two being RUNNING ROB and FIGHTING ROB!!

Run, Rob, Run! (You know Bama Girls have to throw Forrest Gump references out whenever they can.)


It's kind of like watching Rob dance...

Also, remember that weird jacket Rob wore? (Uhh, which time? Cause he wears weird shit quite often, ladies...) It looked like an old varsity letterman jacket without a letter? Well, we caught it on the Eclipse sneak peek, so we're guessing that either Rob stole it from the Eclipse set OR is using his own clothes for films again. Both are fine with us. We like all of Robert's Randoms.

We swear we saw this jacket in the sneak peek, but we need a screen cap to confirm it.

Friday, March 19, 2010

Twilight vs. New Moon - Andee's Take


ATTENTION: If you haven't noticed yet Grey is a very good writer....Andee is not. And Grey usually proofreads my posts before I post them. So this is a warning....I'm all on my own today....so I apologize already!
Okay....I'm attempting to do this post without Grey...which is terribly sad...BUT I get to see her tomorrow because we are going to watch New Moon together at my house! So now I'm happy again!(I take that back Grey can't come be we will be on the phone most of the day tomorrow discussing New Moon)


Anyway what I wanted to talk about today is really hard to articulate through words, but I'll try! I'm going to attempt to discuss why the movie "Twilight" still makes you feel different than the movie "New Moon".


VS.




So as I've mentioned before, I watched "Twilight" before I read the book. It made me feel so good/happy that I actually watched it again on the same day back to back and then lied to my husband and said it was my first time watching because I was a little embarassed. I have NEVER done that before. I've NEVER liked a movie that much to watch it twice in a matter of 4 hours! This was a low budget, emo movie that no matter what age you are you LOVE it! Now I'll have to admit I, Andee, am a very bubbly, hyper, former cheerleder and I STILL thought I could have been Bella in high school. What is wrong with me? Does everyone put themselves in Bella's shoes regardless or I'm just crazy? I actually FELT crazy after I watched this movie, I really and truly didn't even want to LOOK in my husbands direction for a couple of days...and I LOVE HIM! I just kinda wanted to shout "YOUR NOT EDWARD, LEAVE ME ALONE!", but I didn't I just told Grey how I really felt and at that time she thought I was crazy because she still had not watched the movie or read the book, but we discuss things like that anyway because we both feel crazy most of the time...its GOOD LIKE THAT!
Let me mention here that I LOVED the movie "New Moon". It was better quality, and it didn't have stupid monkey references thrown in AND it didn't have stupid tree climbing scenes!


There are no words for this scene....

BUT it still wasn't the same as "Twiligh"t. I actually didn't feel too bathos in as many scenes of "New Moon" as I did "Twilight".


Since I can't acuratley describe my feelings about Twilight, I really want to hear from y'all...


So I pose a serious question to you commenters, can ANYONE explain why I/WE feel different about the movie "Twilight" than "New Moon"?

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Breaking Dawn: Grey's Cut (Available at Wal-Mart Locations Everywhere)

A quick recap from yesterday:

  • Jacob imprints on Nessie and it's creepy.
  • While it wasn't anything close to "imprinting," in the olden days, being a teenaged male who knew he was going to marry a 8 year old female was pretty normal.
  • Jacob's feelings/motives for Nessie were not pervy.
  • Stephanie Meyer obviously wanted Jacob to be happy and this was her chosen way to make that happen.
  • It's still a little creepy.
So, as promised, here is Grey's Version of Breaking Dawn *dun-dun-dunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!*

Eclipse ends the same way, with Jacob brokenhearted because Bella was going to marry Edward. (Which is what happens to love triangles--someone's gonna get hurt, unless you decide to move into the whole menage a trois thing, and I'm PRETTY SURE that Jacob and Edward wouldn't have gone for that. Bella was really disappointed when they told her "no.") Breaking Dawn begins the same, too, except we'll leave out that really awkward and not-in-any-way normal conversation where Bella lets Jacob know that she and Edward are going to have cautious sex before she's a vampire, and he gets so pissed off that he almost phases and kills Edward right there, BECAUSE I HATE THAT PART. Possibly the 5 or so lines I hate most in the entire saga.

Bella and Edward go off on their honeymoon and Bella comes back pregnant. Same as Steph's BD. Jacob still protests when the pack wants to kill Bella and the baby, is still worried and concerned for Bella's safety,still hates Edward because he got the girl and then got the girl pregnant, and--most importantly--still hates the "thing" that Bella is carrying.

And then the baby is born.

Now, I said that my version would blow your mind, but I was lying. Actually, my idea for the movie is pretty simple. Here are the steps that must be in place for my version to work:

My movie version first deviates from Twilight canon in that you remove all knowledge that the wolves imprint on first sight. All you have to do is not mention that in Eclipse, and you're good. In fact, LEAVE OUT THE WHOLE SCENE where Jacob talks about Quil imprinting on a little girl. He can explain imprinting to Bella, fine, but no Quil/Claire and no mention of "at first sight."

Both of these are possible because Eclipse hasn't come out yet, and they can easily not have that scene in there.

Now, when Nessie is born, there should be no mention of Jacob imprinting on Nessie. The audience should be aware that SOMETHING happens when Jacob sees the baby (and the Twilight fans will know what that something is supposed to represent). Make it a small moment. A pause. A connection, where Jacob sees that Nessie's eyes are intellegent, not bloodthirsty and savage. Let that look change his heart from hatred of Nessie to acceptance of her. Add a little bit of curiousity and facination about her, and you've got the foundation for my fantastic ending to BD....

Now, Jacob has accepted Nessie and there's something about her that he can't quite place, but since he's broken off from his pack, there's no reason why he can't keep hanging around the Cullens. If the audience is perceptive enough, they will realize that Jacob isn't really moondogging (lol at my own pun) after Bella anymore, and understand why. Others will just think he's finally accepted defeat. Maybe throw in a little bit of Leah in there, to throw people off track. (I mean, COME ON, you guys saw it too...there was totally potential there for Jacob and Leah to hook up. If I hadn't already known that he would imprint on Nessie before I read BD, I totally would have thought that Stephanie was going to take it there...)

All this (Jacob still being with the Cullens, his lessening interest in Bella) will be masked by the fact that the danger from Irina and the Volturi begins almost immediately. Since Bella trusts Jacob, he is still there to help protect Nessie, and he is still the obvious choice to take her if they all die fighting the Volturi. But they don't die, because they prove to the Volturi that Nessie isn't a threat. The End.

Just kidding.

It's 7 years later...

....the Cullens have moved on, to Alaska. They couldn't stay in Forks forever, after all. The wolf packs stay in the Forks area, protectors of their land. But Bella, Edward, and Renesmee regularly come back to visit Charlie and Jacob, like once a year, so they have seen Renesemee grow up quickly. But this time, Jacob comes into Charlie's house, turns the corner, and boom....

....finds himself staring face to face with a beautiful 17-year-old Nessie. And then there's a BIG MOMENT, deep eye staring, jaw slowly dropping, as recognition of what's happening takes hold. Jacob has imprinted. He knows it, Bella and Edward know it, the audience knows it (Charlie's clueless).

And then the movie's over.

Seriously, I end the movie there. I'm not kidding.

I like my version, because it avoids any hint of impropriety with small children AND gives us a glimpse of the happily ever after of Bella and Edward. AND shows us what Renesmee will look like grown up.

So, Melissa Rosenburg? I'm waiting for my royalty check. And, you're welcome.

What did you guys think? Was it lame? Did it leave any gaping plot holes? Do you have ideas of how to handle Breaking Dawn? Please comment and let us know!!!

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Breaking Dawn: I don't hate it, but...

(Note: This is just Grey's opinion of a certain part of BD. If you feel differently, we won't hate you or anything. And, oh gah, please don't hate us. We are total people-pleasers, it would kill us. But if you have a different opinion, please feel free to share it. Cause we're also sharing people.)

I read Agatha Christie novels. I think I’ve read almost all of them actually, but it wasn’t until the other night that I picked up her autobiography. In it, I read something pretty interesting that I---of course---related back to Twilight. (Because it's like EVERYTHING relates back to Twilight at some point. Is that a sign of obsession?) Or more specifically, Breaking Dawn.

"Damnnnn, Agatha! How'd you get so awesome?.......What?.....Oh....oh, Dame Agatha. I see."

 
(Totally Off-Topic Note: Does anyone watch Roseanne? Do you remember the episode where Roseanne and Dan do their taxes at the last minute? And every time someone says any variation of the word "audit" the music goes "Dun-dun-DUNNNNNNNNNN!" and they look around for where it could be coming from? THAT'S what happens to me when I hear/see the words "Breaking Dawn."

Hear it?)



Agatha tells the story of how her parents met and married. (Note: Agatha was born in 1890, so obviously it was the mid-1800's when her parents hooked up.) Her father, Frederick, and her mother, Clarissa, were step-cousins and Frederick was a teenager when Clarissa was a young girl.

Frederick was amused by his little cousin and she adored him. They got along very well, until one day, one of Frerdick's friends told him, “You know, you’re going to marry your little cousin Clarissa one day.” And while the thought had never before crossed Frederick's mind, he now seriously considered it. And yes, FELL IN LOVE WITH HER. When Claire turned 16, Frederick asked permission to marry her. Her guardians were unsure at first, because she was so young, but because Frederick was so in love with her, they finally assented. And eventually Agatha was born.

(And yes, I am aware of the fact that I am about to call Jacob and ReeNee out, while blatantly ignoring the fact that these two people were semi-related. It's because I'm southern, I come from a town of 5,000. The ENTIRE TOWN is related. It's no biggie for me.)

Look how chaste. It's precious. Ok, well that shoulder is a little bare....hmmm, she may get up on the trampy side of the bed after all.

When I first read this, my first thought was "Ewww." I can't help it, there is just something a little bit creepy about a physically mature (youknowwhatimsayin) male looking at an elementary-aged female and thinking, "One day, I'll hit that" "Someday, that young lass may be my wife." And it was yet ANOTHER reminder of one of the most uncomfortable parts of the Twilight Saga: Jacob imprinting on Renesemee (I don't even care if I've spelled that name right.)

Now, I've done some thinking about the whole "early bethrothal/imprinting" thing, and I've come to understand it. I don't think either Jacob or Agatha Christie's father is a perv. I don't think that Jacob imprinting on a tiny child was quite the way for Steph to go, but here's a little scenario that makes me feel better:

George? Yes, dear? You know I love you, don't you, darling? And I, you, my pet. George? Yes, dear? When you die, I do get all the money, don't I?......George?

Jim and Jane are born on the same day in the mid 1800's. They grow up next door to each other and spend their childhood together. Eventually, Jim goes away to school; Jane is taught at home. After school, Jim either enlists in the army/begins training for his vocation/does something useful, while Jane is ready to be married. Jane's parents start looking for suitable matches. Guess who is not one of them? Jim, because he is just starting to establish his career and "credentials" to be a good husband. So Jane will marry George, who is like 10 years older than Jim, and already established and ready to be a proper providing husband.

Now, if all the Jane's in the neighborhood are engaged to George's, then who is left for the Jim's to marry?
Yes, maybe someone older, if she's wealthy (think: a cougar with money). But more likely....

....someone younger.

(Did I just blow your mind?.................Oh, you had already thought of that? Nevermind.)

So, obviously, it's really pretty historcially normal in polite society for a 18-year-old boy to look at a younger girl and wonder what she'll be like when she grows up. Because that's really the key, isn't it? Jacob isn't looking all pervy at the tiny Renesemee. The pervy looks won't start until she's closer to his age, and by then they won't be pervy at all....just normal, everyday horny male teen thoughts. And Nessie will be having those same-ish type thoughts, too.

So I spent all this time justifying in my head why it was morally, historically, and logically alright for Jacob to imprint on Nessie, only to say this:

That it is the New Millenium, Stephanie Meyer. And IT. IS STILL. CREEPY.  I don't want Jacob to be creepy. I like Jacob the Warrior for Bella's Heart and Soul. Jacob the Technical Leader of His Entire Effing Tribe. Jacob the Bad Ass Biker. I like these Jacobs. So why would you want to insert a story line where people could potentially view him as Jacob the Seriously Disturbed and Dangerously Close to Committing a Felony?
Ok, everyone's a kid here. It's not that creepy. But the fact that somone used it to symbolize Jacob and Renesmee...and there's even a dog in it...

I get it, Steph---it ties up your story quite nicely, doesn't it? No feeling bad for Jacob because Bella chose Edward, all loose ends tied up, everyone happy. But do you know who's not going to be happy, Steph?
All those people that see Breaking Dawn: The Movie without reading Breaking Dawn: The Book *almost peed myself when orchastra music startled me*, who will finally, FINALLY be able to assert--with absolute positivity--that Twilight fans are f*cking crazy.

So I've got a way to save the day--an idea for the Breaking Dawn *plugs ears because the dun-dun-dunnnnnnnn is kinda loud* that could avoid the entire mess AND give us die-hard Twi-hards a little treat, as well. Oh, yeah...it's gonna bend the rules of Twilight canon, but only a little bit. It's going to change some stuff up. Maybe it will be awesome, or at least pretty decent.

Oh, and it will be here tomorrow. Muah-ha-ha-ha....

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Twilight Convention Day Three: Shiny objects (like Tinsel's hair) distract us. That's why this post is so late.

Where we live, there is a local radio station that plays soft rock and adult contemporary music. It's pretty awesome for when you want to just mellow out or hear some 80's tunes. And it is almost literally playing in every office, over every loudspeaker, and anytime you've been placed on hold in the Wiregrass. And cheese and crackers, they have so many contests, like....one an hour.

The station? 99.7.

The call signal?

WOOF-FM.

So at least every hour, EVERYONE in the Wiregrass hears this:

"ArrrrrrrrrrrOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.......ooooo---ooooo---ooooo"

Oh, yeah. The "Wolf Howl."

Ta-daaaaa. Intro into Day 3 of the Atlanta Official Twilight Convention, a.k.a. Wolf Pack Day. YOU'RE WELCOME.

Hearts, G.

Take it away, Ms. Andee....

Well, Day Three started off really well with a Belgian waffle for Andee and Oatmeal with bananas and pecans for Grey. But we must admit....WE WERE EXHAUSTED! I got a tip for the Creation people that host TwiCon, could you please plan your itinerary around food, because we were hungry ALL. THE. TIME. They put activities THAT WE COULD NOT MISS, back to back. I fondly remember having to go to the Gift Shop to buy Pringles (like $3 for a half can), Cheez-its (almost $4 for the cutest little box, that was about 1/4 of a normal size box), and a 20oz Bottled Coke that cost $2.91 for lunch almost everyday we were there! And I don't know if you know this but us southern girls LIKE TO EAT when we go out of town because more than likely ALABAMA doesn't have many GOOD restaurants (Note From Grey: Ummm, I live outside of Dothan, where we have "Restaurant Row," or literally restaurants located next to restaurants next to restaurants. Andee's the one that has to starve at the whole in the wall town where she lives.)

Last breakfast as queens of the hotel before heading back to the real world

Okay I'm done with my only negative view on TwiCon...

Kiowa Gordon....ummmmm....totally cute, with his Zac Efron swoop hair. At first you couldn't see his gorgeous hair because he came out wearing a hat, but someone from the audience told him, yes, I mean TOLD him, to take off his hat so we could get better pictures of him. I tell you girls, he COULD NOT take a bad picture! He was completely adorable, a little shy, but ADORABLE. At one point somebody asked him if he could do any stunts and he said "All I know how to do is fall" and everybody cheered and said "Do it!" and he graciously got up and fell dramatically off the stage. It looked like it totally hurt  for real and we felt bad, but it was HILARIOUS!
Kiowa G. What up, dawg?

Next was Tinsel Korey. She was the only GIRL that did Q and A at the TwiCon, so we really didn't know what we were going to think about her, but she was PRECIOUS! She was very cool and collected and VERY FUNNY. At one point a little girl stood up to ask a question, and it was hard to hear her, so the whole room turned around to find the person asking the question and with all those eyes on her, the little girl almost started crying because she was sooo shy. Tinsel Korey jumped off the stage and ran up to her and hugged her and let her ask the question without the microphone and THEN she brought her up on stage to sit with her just to chill while she answered more questions from the audience! IT WAS SOO SWEET! And now we LOVE Tinsel Corey!
This was so sweet of Tinsel. The lucky little girl got to go backstage, too!

And here's where it gets tricky. We actually saw Gil Birmingham's Q and A on Saturday, but we saved talking about him until Day 3 because this is THE WOLF PACK day, after all. And in actuality he did 2 Q and A's (one on Sunday and one on Saturday). We were losers and wanted to FINALLY get a minute to shop and eat a DECENT meal that we skipped him and the costume competition on Sunday. I know we probably REALLY missed out! But...anyhoo....Gil! He was a VERY BUFF older gentleman who  reminded me of the guy off of Free Willy, but way cuter. He was pretty interesting....he mentioned that while they were filming the scene in Eclipse around the campfire, it got late and they got goofy and Taylor Lautner stuffed 30 pieces of gum in his mouth to see how many he could fit and then somebody said "You could sell that on ebay for a fortune!"

Every time Gil would mention Taylor Lautner, he would pause before he said the name, and then say it with gusto! And we would all cheer. Poor Gil.

Then it was autograph time, the last scheduled event of The Official Twilight Convention in Atlanta 2010 :( We waited in line to get Tinsel and Kiowa's autographs. (We didn't get Gil's because as we've previously mentioned on another blog post WE WOULD HAVE TO PAY EXTRA, and we were ALREADY spending a FORTUNE!) So we go up to Tinsel at the autograph table and she gets Grey's New Moon Illustrated Movie Companion with her little post-it that said her name "GREY" so that Tinsel could personalize the autograph. Tinsel says, "Hey, you must have had hippie parents too!" and Grey says "No..." Nice one, Grey. (She honestly really didn't know what to say and got confused because the BRILLIANT GREY decided to use our blogger names the whole weekend...which might I add was REALLY HARD!)

But then I embarassed myself, too, because I followed up Grey's stellar answer with "Tinsel, your hair is so pretty," which it really was but it sounded REALLY stalker-ish...like my next questions would be "Can I touch it? Can I have some of it?" So, we FAILED with Tinsel K. And by the time we got to Kiowa we were just TIRED of coming up with witty comments so Andee just said "Hey, I wanted you to sign this page because it has you before you were a wolf and after"...

.....Wow. That was actually so embarrassing it was hard to write. Then Grey followed up with "Thank you, Kiowa" and then looked at her book and he had signed the WRONG page. (Note from Grey: Oh, yes. The funny was gone, and so were most of my motor skills.)
That's us....the forkheads.

Oh well! We really are a true pair of IDIOTS! And we love it!

So there it is!!! The final day of our amazing Twilight adventure! And only 9 whole days after it actually happened!

Monday, March 15, 2010

Spoilers. SPOILERS. SpOiLeRs. SPOILers. spoilERS. (This doesn't even look like a real word anymore.)

One FINAL alert: This is a post about Remember Me. If you haven't seen it and don't want to  know the ending, don't read this yet! We have warned you several times. We are not responsible for you being a spoiler whore.

On Friday, we got to see Remember Me. We can't tell you how excited we were to see Rob's first post-Twilight film. Would he be any good? Would the movie prove him to be a big box office draw and solidify his career outside of Twilight? Would people like the ending? (Yes, we were already aware of the movie's ending--more on that later.)

We arrived at the theater about 15 minutes to showtime, and we (and by "we", really just Grey) were a little disappointed that there didn't seem to be that many people there, but the theater filled up right before the trailers started. It wasn't New Moon packed, but all the good seats were taken.

We thought we had good seats, about halfway up the stadium and on the end. We always like to choose the end, so that any bathroom breaks don't interfere with other people's viewing experience. (We are so considerate.) Plus, it's less claustrophobic too, and that makes Grey happy. Like we said, we thought they were good seats.

The lights dimmed and we did a little happy squirm in our seats, because we knew that the Eclipse trailer would be coming soon. Every time that green "The following PREVIEW is rated...." screen came up, we would whisper to each other, "Is this it? Is this it?" until it finally WAS! We did a little squee....

....and that's when the trouble started.

Like we said before, we thought we had good seats. But apparently not, because as soon as the Eclipse trailer started rolling, the two girls behind us started talking. Loudly.

And then one of them said "Twilight sucks."

Now, Andee and Grey are not mean people. We are actually kind of wimpy and non-confrontational. But after 2 viewings of New Moon being totally effed up (once by a coughing personal space bubble invader and once by a crying baby),  it was on. Both of us turned around INSTANTLY. Andee asked "Are you kidding me?" and Grey told them "You can't sit behind us. Seriously."


Do we have to get a praying mantis up in here to tell you to be quiet? Cause we will...

Now we were pretty proud of ourselves for being so outspoken, but we have to be honest here: we may have said this in a kind of joking way, because we are essentially wimpy and passive. And not even passive-aggressive. Just passive. So it didn't really work, and the two bitches behind us kept talking. Like every time Edward was on screen, they would go "He sparkles. He sparkles." One of them even said, "I only came to see this movie because Robert Pattinson was in it" and at first we thought, "Then WHY are you running your big fat mouths?" but then we realized that it was probably sarcasm. Those little bitches.

And then Remember Me started.

Those little heifers laughed at inappropriate moments. They talked and giggled almost constantly. We kept trying to drown them out, but it just wouldn't work. We began scanning the theater for two empty seats, and finally found some a couple of rows down. The girls giggled as they saw that we were not leaving for the bathroom, but leaving their vicinity. We sure showed them. *Sarcasm*

I bet Tyler Keats Hawkins would have known how to shut them up...

We know we should have stood up to them better. We were probably 5 years older than they were, and usually if you stand up to people, they back off. (Or so we've heard. We've never actually tried.) We had all sorts of scenarios in our heads for how we would deal with them if we weren't giant babies, including one where Grey takes her shoe off, stands up, turns around and throws it in one of the girls' faces and screams "SHUT THE F*CK UP, YOU LITTLE BITCHES!!!!!!!!" and then everyone in the movie theater claps as the girls hunch down into their stadium seats, embarrassed and silenced. That would have been nice. *Sigh*

So, the movie. We loved it. We loved Rob. He was so, so, SO good. He captures angst so perfectly. Almost every time he was on screen, we just wanted to jump into the movie and give Tyler a big ol' hug and let him know that everything was going to be ok.

Look at the plaid pillow to match his plaid shirt. How cute.

Well, at least until the end.

If you've seen the movie, you know that Tyler dies in 9/11. If that wasn't tragic enough, he dies after finding out that everything and every one in his life is going to be ok, including him. He has a brief, shining morning of perfection, before it's all over. We knew it was coming, so it made that part hard to watch. Obviously, people in our theater didn't know, because there were a few shocked exclamations in the audience when the teacher wrote the date on the chalkboard.

Andee and Grey were not entirely sure how we should feel about the 9/11 ending. As Southerners, we live far, far away from New York City, not just in miles but in attitudes, lifestyles, etc. The South is different from the North. And while we may not have had the Twin Towers disappear from our skyline, we were sitting in Mrs. Trammel's 1st period history class when someone stuck their head in the door and told us to turn on the TV, that something was happening in NYC. It was Homecoming Week, and that Tuesday was Blast from the Past Day. Andee was dressed as one of The Three Musketeers. Grey was Marilyn Monroe. We were in 11th grade.

Grey as MM before school (Waiting to see if Andee has a pic from that morning. She can't go look on her computer because NONE OF US HAD DIGITAL CAMERAS THEN. Weird.)

We sat there, a classroom full of 16-year-olds from south Alabama, and cried as we watched the towers fall on live television. It wasn't happening to us, but at the same time, it was. For 16 years, we had been invincible, and now we weren't. No, we weren't in NYC. We didn't lose family members or friends. We didn't have to rebuild our lives. God bless all those that did, and God bless New York City. But we can empathize and sympathize, because just like 11th graders in NYC that day, we lost our innocence, too. The world was no longer the same place for us that it was on Monday, September 10th. And it has obviously stuck with us ever since.

So it was with very serious minds that we thought about the 9/11 ending.

  • Should the 9/11 ending have even happened? Tyler could very well have been hit by a cab, or shot in the subway. Or someone could have broken into his apartment and killed him, because we can't remember if he ever did get that deadbolt. 
  • Should they have casted British and Australian actors to play the lead characters? It was an American tragedy, after all.
  • Should RM have stuck to the original script? We believe that the original script called for Tyler's brother Michael to have been killed at the World Trade Center instead of committing suicide. What you don't realize until the end is that Michael dies when the WTC is bombed in 1993, not during 9/11. So when Tyler dies in 9/11,  it's a shock because you don't realize that it hasn't happened yet, so it's more of a twist and less of a pointless use of 9/11.
  • Would using 9/11 as a twist be worse than using it for emotional reaction? Would it actually trivialize the event? We used to think that it was wrong of them to make Michael commit suicide, and that taking the twist out of the movie would make the use of 9/11 pointless. But now we're not so sure.
  • Is the use of 9/11 really pointless? It was a tragic event in American history. At some point, it will be portrayed in movies. It was an important, impactful moment in time, and events like that are almost destined to appear on screen. Was this a horrible portrayal of 9/11? No, it was quite good. They filmed it just right--no planes, no sensationalism. 
We really didn't find definitive answers to any of these questions, but we do know that we really enjoyed the movie. Rob was fantastic, and so was the rest of the cast. With Rob and Emilie, it was like watching two real people on the screen, and that is probably (hopefully) what most actors strive for, right? Even if you did want to punch Aiden in the face, or tell Tyler and Ally to act more like 21-year-olds and less like 30-year-olds. Or remind the Hawkins crew that those little brats didn't cut Caroline's throat with the scissors, just her hair.
Ok, so they do look like college kids here...

Or throw your shoes at giggling bitches sitting behind you.